Thursday, July 22, 2010

The fruits of labor of from my couch cushion neighbor, Dread continues to rock

Almost a week has gone by since this happened:
Can't see what's going on? Then read below and know you missed out on a gripping, emotional moment where the video sets the tone and you are only getting a fraction of the experience.

The doubleheader at Shriners contained some of the greatest plays we have seen from our home team and Massacre skater skaters this season.  In front of nearly a thousand fans, four teams gave it their all in the mercifully air-conditioned auditorium. While the Cosmonaughties won the bout, the Nutcrackers were able to staunch the bleeding and keep pace with them. However, the person who kept pace the most was the missus. That's right, Dreadnought, who was able to race after players and suck them back into the pack like the angry tentacle of a pink-hued, primordial kraken. My wife, whose ass and shoulders are already a forced to be reckoned with at home and on the track proved that she's a LOT faster than any of us imagined. Including herself.

It's been a long road for Dread on the track. Her first season with the league, she didn't even skate. Injuries sidelined her and slowed her progress while members of her fresh meat class went on to soar among the veterans that had inspired all of them to join. It was tough as sin for her, but she did not give up. She trained harder, listened to feedback, and worked until even I was fatigued. You cannot stop Dreadnought when she's decided to do something, as I have found out in countless, frustrating non-derby moments. Here, that stubborn will is an asset.

Over the past year, after the Nuts' Championship win, it's only gotten more impressive. Dread's gotten leaner, meaner and speedier. Saturday's MVP win (bet you wish you watched the video) was proof that effort and perseverance brings victories that are better savored than success right out of the gate.

It's not just her skating. The roller derby quilt is nearly finished and she's working on getting a book published about it. A lesser, pettier writer would be jealously guarding his medium from his wife's incursion, but she let me invade the world of the flat track. I'm also not a jealous dude. See how I was able to give myself thumbs up in an article about her? That's awesome. Thankfully, she's not writing an autobiography, as someone's already beaten her to it:

Yeah, you better be Dreading me.

To think, were it not for that A&E series, the desire to hit ladies with her butt would never have been realized. Now if only we could find something on television as challenging for this little lady:

  She knows the remotes are important, and that they bring horses into the house through that stupid box.


  1. No doubt about it...Dread was amazing.

    There was one Jam near the end of the bout where the Cosmos were on a power jam with Lady Shatterly. She's fast. REAL fast.

    Out ahead of the pack Dread managed to hold back Shatterly for nearly 3/4s of a lap with some amazing positional blocking before finally incurring an "Out of Play" penalty. Shatterly may just have well been trying to circumnavigate Greenland.

    I don't think any Massacre blocker could have done better. That was, for me, single best bout play of the evening.

  2. i love your dog and your wife. you're ok too. i really wish i could have seen this bout!

  3. you have a blog, too? great. now i'll never get anything done.

  4. oh, my stevie-poo awoo, i do love you! who else could compare his totally beloved wife to 'the angry tentacle of a pink-hued primordial kraken'? good writing, my lad! pace, energy, no sense of distance at all. remember i get all the credit--so when you get your nobel prize, remember to say that it's all because of your writing teacher.....[see, i too know how to get some self-praise into a complement to someone else...]