Before we start, however, I googled "Turkey in Rollerskates" for this entry. Here are two images from the first page of thumbnails:
The turkey seems to be at least anticipating a roller disco. The lady, though, just has her boobies out. What the hell, internet?
I tend to give you all the most positive, funny moments of roller derby because there's already plenty of things to whine and complain about out there. To have roller derby in your life means you are part of a very passionate community. It's like being part of an immense extended family. Occasionally, you're in the room with your arsonist cousin, or your ridiculously vain aunt who can never seem to see the hairy, red mole on her cheek. You grin and bear it, wish them well and look for the relatives you want to talk to before you head home. It's life. Not everyone has to get along. Nor should we. Let us celebrate what goes right. So, in the spirit of showing off our brightest colors, here's what I've loved this year.
Sunday afternoon cooldowns w/ the Paines
From the start of the season until June, this was derby sacrament. Lil Paine and the Prince (aka The Kid, AKA Prince of Paine, etc) would get together with Dread and I after a bout to decompress and hang around. It was something that I always looked forward to, and though time and other aspects of life got in the way, I hope it will return.
Powerjammers.net, the podcast I do with Solo, Johnny Deep, Lady O and Three-Day Bender really started to take shape this year. We recorded thirty-eight podcasts. Hell, because of our prodding, we got NHRD and GMDD to play a rematch at the end of the year. Unfortunately, it was during the BDD playoffs and we couldn't go! The site's getting an overhaul, and we're stepping up our game for the next season. The market's flooding, and we want to expand.
ECDX, Regionals, and Championships
Wow. Yes, I called at 2009 Nationals, but ECDX allowed me to get to know (and learn to love) so many people from all over the world. Hell, I talked about these experiences in this blog before. Still, it's good to know that there are so many people out there who are friendly, kind, and not so stuck up their own bums to shed their pretentious "game faces" and have fun.
Regionals, being able to call with "old" friends made months prior, was a dream come true. I can't wait to do more of it.
|I am on teh WEBZ!|
This one's bittersweet. To take on a job like this and build a process by which future heads will go by (or toss aside like so much "whatevs") was a huge challenge. Bully, Chris and I took it on, took a few hits in popularity at times, but people were mostly really happy with us. There are people that got hurt, which really makes me feel awful, but in the end we left it better than we found it. Personally, I'm glad to be rid of it, but man did we do some pretty cool things.
As a writer, I love to experience everything I can, so traveling the country to see this sport has been rewarding. Meeting people around town that had nothing to with derby is always neat. For example, I neglected to mention in my last post was that an older waitress in Chicago fell in love with me and was excited that I ate all of my biscuits and gravy. The Splatters and Dread teased me, but I believe that she was getting a contact high from all my gratitude and good manners.
I have been a mascot, a security guard, lighting guy, volunteer (and then bout) coordinator, but the best job in this sport is announcing. Also, it's something that I get better at every time I get on the microphone. My best work, I feel, was during Regionals. Why? Because I stuck to the game and did more play-by-play than ever and I was still funny. And a special thank you to everyone at the Derby News Network who gave me opportunities to make my Dad proud. Thank you.
Calling with Reverend Al, Lady O, Dumptruck, and so many GREAT people only makes me want to work harder. Which brings me to this:
Lady O and the Reverend Al Mighty
There's a lot of things in life I'm thankful for, and the two of them are on the level of my favorite writers and professors.
I have no small amount of love for Lady Oshun, without whom I am adrift on the PA systems of New England. Her thunderous, smooth voice casts out the greatest team introductions I have ever heard. Other announcers have remarked to feeling chills when hearing her summon Boston's skaters to the track. I have never gotten over the novelty of her ability, willingness to exceed her own expectations, and to put her all into everything we do. She inspires me not to just be a better emcee, but a better man.
|Jim Henson's creature shop created the "Pelvis Costello" Muppet to say the things Lady O doesn't care to.|
Truly, I am blessed to know her and call her my friend and partner. By partner, I mean it in the sense your grandfather thinks of before realizing you mean "lover." Our platonic lovefest is one for the ages.
Of course, where would I be without the Reverend Al? Likely, I'd still be a chimpanzee shouting and leaping for the Cosmonaughties. He may have saved my knees from further damage, but at the cost of all of your ears. That suits me fine. Over the past few years, the two of us have become very good friends. He's one of the wisest, kindest men you could meet. What may surprise you, is how much he is willing to share the microphone, his food, bronzer, whatever you need. Reverend Al is the best roommate I have ever had, outside of Dread, for any road trip, and I will always be grateful to him for telling me to ditch the fur for announcing.
|And he was a barbarian for my birthday!|
Announcing is my job in derby. My reason for being here, what really gets me excited, is watching Dread play. Watching her come along, improve with every game, and give this sport her everything is what made me get involved in the first place. From her starting point to now, she's become a real force on and off the track. Now, she's going to be the Nuts' 2011 co-captain. Hard work pays off, people.
|It's my height that causes women to hold me like a rockabilly lapdog.|
Dread is my muse, my confidant, and my wife. She's also my best friend. More importantly, she is my favorite player.
2011 has a tough act to follow.